I suspect that my relationship is over as of today. I don't know for sure, but the way the girlfriend was talking it would seem that she's going to try and reconcile with the ex. Why she would have even a sliver of a thought that something so dead could be worked on I don't know. But the thing she told me is that she needs to know for sure if there is anything there.

The evidence that she herself presented to me points to no. But her willingness to leave what she herself has stated is the love of her life, for what she herself has stated has been dead for years, baffles me.

Strangely enough, last week I felt confident that she would stay with me. But over the course of the week her statements have made me think she is not, in favor of a dead relationship. Last night my last text to her asked her if she was gonna see me tonight. We had made plans to see each other after I get off work. But I told her to not show up if her choice was her ex. She didn't respond. So once again she leave me in limbo. My friends have told me that I should have left her when she told me she was gonna see if there was something there, as a matter of principle. I love her, so I'm hoping that her love for me is enough to convince her that what she had is dead, and poison. But I suspect that love may not be enough.

I will mourn this when the outcome is final. It will take all the emotional strength I have to walk away from the woman I love and never speak to her again. But it's what must be done. Wish me luck either way.